Posts Tagged ‘shark’

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Humanity’s greatest artistic achievement? Maybe. “Mega Shark Versus Kolossus”

July 23, 2015

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Well, it seems rumors of the Mega Shark’s demise were greatly exaggerated, as the good folks at The Asylum Pictures have dusted him off for yet another outing. Either these god-awful movies are more lucrative than I imagined or they really want to get their 150 bucks worth out of the CGI shark rendering they bought (probably online). Whatever the case, now I feel pretty silly getting all sentimental at the end of Mega Shark vs. Mecha Shark. I swear I wouldn’t have gone on a three-day bender and sent all those weepy texts to Deborah Gibson if I knew that a scant year later the big guy would be back to battle its greatest foe yet: a massive Russian humanoid robot-bomb. Yes, just let that sink in a bit.
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Sea monsters will eat your plane: “Mega Shark Versus Giant Octopus”

May 25, 2009

200px-MegasharkvsgiantoctopusSo, Mega Shark versus Giant Octopus. Well, can’t really go wrong with that combination, can you? And, to its credit, the movie does deliver. There is a mega shark. There is an octopus. The octopus is giant. And they fight (lest you think this is a movie about the 1988 Supreme Court decision M. Shark v. G. Octopus). On top of this we get attacks on ships, planes, submersibles, and even the Golden Gate Bridge. We get Lorenzo Llamas acting like a douchebag, and Debbie (sorry, Deborah) Gibson acting…well…bless her for trying. You know, I’m going to spend several paragraphs ragging on MSvGO, but what you cannot accuse it of is dishonesty.
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